Posted by atp on August 27, 2000 at 20:36:51:
In Reply to: The Way Greeks See Their Children vs. The World posted by Michael on August 25, 2000 at 14:53:05:
: I have noticed a lot of posts on here about a Greek/non-Greek relationship and the whole issue of the parents and the customs, etc.
: I thought that I might throw in my two cents. I am 30 years old raised by Greek parents in the US. Married an American woman since no Greek woman deserved me in my parents' eyes. Have a beautiful family with this woman and I am very happy.
: Greeks are ethnocentrists. Whether that means that they "prefer" their culture to others or think that they are better than everyone else is open for debate. Greeks fear foreigners corrupting their children. They fear losing control over them. Greek parents are very much "control freaks" and they love to micromanage everything about their child's life. I once had a Jewish friend who said that his culture was the same. I don't know about that, but, it's possible. Guilt is a very big tool in Greek families. When I married my wife, I went from being my mother's angel to the devil incarnate. My mother said things to me that I would not say to my worst enemy. She said so many distasteful things that they cannot be repeated. She called my wife many names and I am embarassed that my own Christian mother used those words to describe anyone. The Greeks see foreign women as witches out to steal their sons through the allures of the flesh. Little do they realize that the Greek parents are the ones doing the brainwashing.
: After they met my wife (and sought psychotherapy), my parents treat my wife better than any of their real children. She will never be Greek though. She will never be perfect and neither will I be.
: My children are angels on earth and my parents try to influence them too. They try and tell me that my half-Greek son is going to grow up and be a doctor/lawyer (Greek Mother's Wet Dream) and marry a Greek woman. Heaven forbid the kid should want to be a journalist or something.
: For those of you wondering, there is a dark side to Greeks that no one cares to mention. I cannot relay how, on the whole, I have been backstabbed by all those that would be my friends except one....my best friend
: If you are considering a relationship with a Greek man or woman here is some advice:
: 1) Know what THEY feel about you not being Greek and get an idea of how much their parents dominate them.
: 2) Be sure that this is the person worth going into battle for. If you aren't sure, it's over before it even starts.
: 3) Try to learn some of the culture, language, etc. but don't be totally assimilated! You have rights too.
: 4) Be prepared for facial expressions and language that might be luke-warm or even cold. You will never be Greek and they are just going to have to deal with it.
: 5) Don't judge the relationship by how much acceptance you get. Love your spouse/significant other for all that you can.
: YOU CAN BE HAPPY IN THIS IF YOU ARE TRULY A STRONG, LOVING COUPLE!
Here are some very important facts that you people should know:
1. Greek people have an incomparable heritage. I believe that this may be related to our race, and for this reason, I think that we ought to preserve it.
2. Like Israel and Ireland Greece is a Diaspora Nation. More Greek people live outside the borders of Greece than inside. This is largely due to the upheavals of the 20 th century.
3. The rate of intermarriage of Greeks with non-Greeks is presently an astounding 50 - 80 %. I have read predictions in Greek newspapers claiming that in most places Greek communities will vanish within 20 years if this rate continues. How could this happen ! In my estimation this will constitute the worst catastrophe in our long history. We are committing genocide against our selves and we don't even know it. It's a bloodless genocide, but never the less the results are the same.
Marry/date your fellow Greek. We owe it to our ancestors. We owe it to the next generation and we owe it to our selves.- ATP
Why doesn't this site have a dating page !
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