Re: Am I waisting my time?

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Posted by nick on April 18, 2000 at 12:34:50:

In Reply to: Am I waisting my time? posted by H.L. on February 18, 2000 at 02:19:34:

: I was born in South Africa, with English parents. I am Anglican but don't "practice" my religion, but I have very high standards and morals. I have been seeing the most amazing Greek guy for nearly a year now and am totally in love with him and he with me. He isn't very religious, although his parents are fanatical. I still haven't met them. My guy "doesn't want to subject me to that" because they wont accept me - for obvious reasons.

: I adore him and want to marry him and build our own family together. He only wants to think about that kind of committment in 2 years time. It is starting to affect me because although he says I must trust him that he wont walk away from me because of what his parents say - it's very hard on me because I must just sit and wait.

: I'm starting to get really depressed and it's starting to affect out relationship. Please help me, give me some advice. Am I waisting my time thinking that we will spend out lives together? Am I wrong to want a step towards more committment (like engagment) now?

: H.L.

You have run into a typical situation with some "Greek" folks. They are more concerned about themselves than the happiness of their children. There are many interfaith marriages in the Greek Church today. i believe that in most marriages today, only one of the people is Greek.
You and your greek friend need to come to a mutual agreement, not just what he and his family want. If he will not support you in this effort, then his family will be controlling you in the future. What if his folks don't like what you wear. will your man stand up to them or tell you to do what his folks want? Have you two thought about getting joint counseling to be able to come to a "joint" decision?
Just something to think about!

Good luck, Nick

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